You’re not really free if you’re afraid. I know that sounds dramatic, but stay with me. There’s this Zen story about a general who threatens a monk with a sword, saying he could kill him without blinking. The monk responds, “I’m the type of man who can have a sword put through him without blinking an eye.” That calm acceptance, that complete absence of fear? That’s what real freedom looks like.
Most of us live our entire lives being controlled by fear. We fear losing our jobs, so we stay quiet when we should speak up. We fear rejection, so we never take that leap. We fear death, so we forget to actually live. And every single one of those fears hands power over our lives to something else.
Fear Doesn’t Protect You (Understanding Does)
You might be thinking, “Wait, isn’t fear supposed to keep me safe?” That’s what we’ve been told our whole lives. Be afraid of bears in the forest so you stay alert. Be afraid of financial ruin so you save money. Be afraid of strangers so you don’t get hurt.
But fear and understanding are not the same thing. Knowing that bears exist in the forest and how to respond if you encounter one? That protects you. Being so terrified of bears that you see them in every shadow, every rustling bush, every snapping twig? That blinds you.
When you’re afraid, you stop learning. You become fixated on the thing you fear instead of understanding the world around you. Remember the last time you were genuinely scared? Were you taking in new information, observing your surroundings clearly, making rational decisions? Or were you locked into tunnel vision, seeing only the threat?
Fear makes you check the locked door five times because it won’t let your mind accept new information. You saw the door was locked, but fear doesn’t trust facts. It keeps spinning the same anxious thought loop.
Where Fear Actually Comes From
Every fear starts with a thought about future pain. You imagine losing money, getting hurt, being rejected, dying alone. These mental images of suffering create fear. And why do we have these thoughts in the first place? Because we desperately want to protect ourselves from pain.
You want security, so your mind starts running through every possible threat to that security. What if someone rear ends you? What if your house burns down while you sleep? What if everyone laughs at you? The desire for protection creates an endless stream of fearful scenarios.
Sounds reasonable, right? Wanting to avoid pain is natural. Except there’s a problem: you can’t actually protect yourself from pain.
A tornado could destroy your home tomorrow. You can’t control that. Someone could crash into your car. You can’t control that. A virus you’ve never heard of could upend your entire life. You definitely can’t control that. Your security was never in your hands to begin with. It’s always been in the hands of fate.
Making Peace With Fate
Before you panic and think I’m suggesting you cross streets blindfolded or lie in bed doing nothing, let me be clear. You still make choices. You still take action. You can build an underground bunker if you want, but a supernova could still take out Earth. You can isolate yourself completely, but you’ll suffer from loneliness. You can be reckless, but you’ll probably get hurt.
Fate decides the consequences of your actions, but you control the actions themselves. You don’t get to control outcomes, only inputs.
The key is understanding that fate operates on a contract. Water evaporates at certain temperatures. Planes fly when they follow aerodynamic laws. Balls thrown in the air come down. There are patterns, rules, cause and effect relationships you can learn. By studying these patterns, you can reduce the pain you experience over time. That’s practical. That’s actionable.
But you’ll still experience pain. That’s where most people get stuck.
The Two Truths That Eliminate Fear
To be completely free of fear, you need to accept two things. First, the pain fate gives you is necessary. If you believe fate hands out unnecessary suffering, random cruelty without purpose, you’ll resent the world. You’ll be even more afraid because pain could strike at any moment for no reason, teaching you nothing.
Second, the pain fate gives you is bearable. If you believe fate might hand you something you literally cannot survive emotionally or physically, that thought alone will paralyze you with fear.
When you truly believe that every pain coming your way is both necessary and bearable, fear loses its grip. Not because life becomes painless, but because you stop being controlled by the possibility of pain.
Your Next Step
Nobody’s born fearless. We all carry fears we’ve accumulated over years. But now you know where fear comes from and what feeds it. You know it doesn’t protect you the way you thought it did.
Start noticing when fear is making decisions for you. When it’s stopping you from speaking up, trying something new, or being honest about what you want. Ask yourself: is this fear helping me understand the situation better, or is it just blinding me?
You can’t eliminate all fear overnight. But you can start questioning whether the tyranny you’re living under is worth it. Whether the sword you’re afraid of deserves that much power over your life.
Real freedom isn’t the absence of swords. It’s being the person who doesn’t blink when one’s pointed at you.
If this post sparked a thought, shifted your mindset, or gave you something meaningful — don’t let it end here.
Buy me a coffee to power more of this work. Every cup helps me stay independent and keep delivering value.
Ready for next-level insights?
Upgrade your subscription and unlock exclusive content made just for committed readers like you.
